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Tuesday, September 16, 2014

HATE It When The Adrenalin Wears Off!!

So, yesterday was an interesting afternoon!
Kaleb, returning from school, did the traditional stop off at the shop, checking to see if Angela needed anything at the house, and with order in hand set off to the store.  Shortly thereafter I got a call from Angela stating that when he arrived at the house he noticed that his BMX and one other was missing from the shed.  Enraged, he set out to see if he could track it down.  Angela was perplexed, as she had heard nor seen nothing. Just before close, Kaleb showed up here, downtrodden as he had no leads on his bike.  We packed everything up and headed to the house.  When we came up on Walgreen's at the corner of Union and Patricia, Kaleb made a sudden cross of the road to the other side.  At first I thought he was trying to beat the light but quickly I heard him shout out "DAD!  I found them!". Sure enough, three black youths were riding in the opposing direction, two of them on the stolen bikes!  Quickly, I jet across the road, while at the same time, recognizing that the hoodlums were arguing and posing against Kaleb, who had stop his bike length wise, blocking their passage, I (having already been in a pissed off mood) shouted out to them, in colorful Daddy language, to get off the bikes and leave (yes, I am NOT printing the language I REALLY used!)  They began the traditional, testosterone fueled posturing to me, but were unprepared for the fact that such theatrics hold NO sway against Kaleb or I.  As they shouted threats and demands to be reimbursed for the money they had just paid for the bikes (OH HAHAHAHAH!  THAT'S rich!) I couldn't help but laugh and point out the shear stupidity in "buying" a bike off of "some guy" on the side of the road!  At this point, the loudmouth hood flayed his arms and advanced on me threateningly, to which, I calmly stepped off my bike, advanced towards him, and he quickly backed up.  Kaleb, holding his ground, merely stared them down while holding on to both bikes.  At this point, my normally pacifistic side was ITCHING for one of them to throw a punch, however, as they were all clearly minors, I feared my own incarceration for striking them so I opted to call the police.  911.  At this point, they dropped the bikes, and with constant verbal assaults continued back where they had come from, the general direction of our house.  We were told by dispatch to wait for the officers in the parking lot, which we did.  Kaleb gave the officers physical descriptions, and it was then that the officers informed me, that I need not have worried about getting into trouble should I have defended myself, regardless of the level of injury I may have bestowed upon the animals.  As in Florida, if your person or property is threatened, regardless of where you are, age goes out the window!  You are fully in your right to defend yourself.  One the report was given, Kaleb and I quickly jet to the house, only once there to discover that Angela had just had to call the police on two black teenagers who had cut through our back yard, right in front of the self same shed! 
it seems, shortly after I had called her and told her of the incident we were embroiled in, she was sitting outside on the porch, when Suzanne began to bark threateningly in the house, and then Owen rushed out telling her there were two teenagers coming through our back yard.  Quickly she looked and noticed, sure enough that they had darted upon hearing Suzanne bark, went behind the house next to us and down to the street.  No Angela, being a VERY tough Yankee girl you DO NOT want to mess with, went down to street level, sighted the creatures and politely yelled after them " Excuse me sirs, but f you cut through our yard again, I am going to call the police"  In response to this, they turned around, started walking towards her, threateningly and shouted out "Mind your own F*&ing business, Crakah B!+$H!  We'll walk wherever we want too!" In response, she smiled waved them off and called the police.  I have to give credit to Owen here, though, as well!  When they said that to his mother, he DID NOT take it in stride, rather strode towards them, menacingly exclaiming "DON'T say that to my MOTHER!"  GOD!  I really love that kid!!!
Kaleb and I showed up a scant few minuets after, and when hearing what had transpired, took off in the direction they had gone FULLY read to do some damage!  Trust me, I am a passive man not prone to anger, but threaten my wife and/or kids?  You ARE NOT walking away! 
We got as far as Walmart, only to discover they had quickly faded into oblivion.  Concerned they may double back, we quickly set back for the house, only to find that apparently the entirety of the Clearwater police force was blocking and canvassing the neighborhood.  Quickly coming up upon the house, we saw Angela calmly giving he r report to the police (she IS NOT prone to hysterics).  We reported we unfortunately had not found them.  Shortly thereafter, as we stood with some of the neighbors by the street lamenting over the incursion of our quiet neighborhood by the unwanted and unfortunate element of disrespectful, vile creatures, one of the officer sped up to the house and reported they had apprehended the suspects and as it turns out, on of them was living next door to us.  Concerned, that this was an unfortunate coincidence, and the boy had just been cutting through the yard to get home, Angela decided NOT to press charges.  The officer left with the promise he would give them a stern warning to respect private property, and with a handshake and  wave, left. 
Still jazzed on adrenalin we sat outside, had our evenings brew and recapped the events of the evening.
Then the next door neighbor arrived.  Depositing the two youths in the yard, and going inside herself, she clearly had not bothered to give them any lecture, dressing down or talking too about respect.  OBVIOUSLY they have none!  The two youths proceeded to sit outside and brag on about the events of the evening.  As we listened, I came to realize tat in fact they WERE two of the three scumbag, worthless wastes of human flesh that Kaleb and I encountered earlier that evening!  Quietly snickering, Angela and I listened on as the two railed on about how they would have kicked mine and Kaleb's ass, and how lucky we were they did not!  And how much of men they were, etc., etc., etc.,!  After a few minuets, allowing for a quiet pause I their conversation, just on the other side of the bordering shrubs, I cleared my throat in the quiet stillness of the evening and said to Angela, in a voice SURE to carry,  "WOW!  I cannot believe they are THAT stupid!  To verify NOT ONLY that THEY were the scumbags that stole our bikes...BUT THEY LIVE NEXT DOOR!!!" 
There side of the shrubs fell deathly silent, only to be interrupted by the slamming of their front door!
As Angela has said, and I am paraphrasing "stupidity knows no boundaries!"
SO, we await any backlash, in eager anticipation of retribution of that which has been wrought upon us!  Keep an eye peeled for their obituaries!

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